Are we the only ones out there that sometimes enjoy one of the ultra-synthetic, 100% unnatural, chemical stew “cappuccinos” that come out of those machines at the gas station? Ridiculously sweet, highly caffeinated, and with enough flavoring to nearly permanently scorch the back of your throat with artificial “Creme Brûlée” extract, an eight ounce cup of fake coffee always fondly reminds us a simpler coffee-drinking culture.
And now, thanks to a partnership with Kerry Convenience, a key supplier to the convenience store segment, Hostess is doing pretend cappuccino cancer milk one better: They’re making it Twinkie flavored. Ellen Copaken, vice-president of marketing at Hostess Brands, explains:
“The Twinkie cappuccino not only provides consumers with another option when selecting a treat, it combines two of their favorites into one decadent indulgence.”
The new cappuccino beverage features a combination of milk, sponge cake flavor and presumably, at least a little bit of coffee flavoring. The cappuccino is available at Northeastern “Sheetz” stores, though if you’re in a convenience store in the middle of the night trying in vain to recreate the fleeting feeling of your mother’s touch on your tearstained cheek by drinking cake-flavored hot coffee goop from a faceless machine in some OTHER part of the country, a nationwide rollout is expected in the coming weeks.